The Heart of Hannah

So one day as I was "blog stalking", I came across someone's blog that mentioned Hannah in the book of I Samuel. After skimming her blog, I thought, "Now this might be something I should check into." You see, I'm sort of where Hannah was, crying out to God and asking Him when will it be my turn. I like to put on a brave face and say that I am at peace and I know God will bless us when it is in His timing, and believe me, I do KNOW this but it doesn't make the longing go away.

Hannah's rival was her husband's other wife, Peninnah and my rival is the Enemy. Peninnah would provoke Hannah and flaunt her children before her. Well, the devil does the same to me. I see pregnant women everywhere. Some are complete strangers and some are dear friends. I am so excited for every woman that has the extreme privelidge of bringing a new life into this work however the devil always seems to be there saying, "Yup, but it's not you is it?" (If you ever see me fervently doing a karate kick at the air, that would be me kicking him in the teeth for some snide remark such as that.)

When Hannah could no longer bear her burden, she cried out to God. The Word tells us, "In bitterness of soul Hannah wept much and prayed to the Lord." How comforting for me to know that I'm not the only one that goes to Him a little bitter from time to time. Hannah cried out to God saying, "O Lord Almighty, if you will only look upon your servant's misery and remember me, and not forget your servant but give her a son, then I will give him to the Lord for all the days of his life and no razor will ever be used on his head." WHOA!!! She had me right up to the point of giving him right back. Reminds me of Abraham and Isaac, how about you? Am I ready for that? Would I be willing to give my firstborn back to the Lord? Man I wish I could say you betcha without even thinking about it. But that is exactly what Hannah did. As soon as Samuel was old enough, she took him back to the house of the Lord at Shiloh, where she had made her promise to the Lord, and she gave him to the priest. Oh, to have the heart of Hannah.

As I continue to seek God through the story of Hannah and Samuel, I will be praying that He change my heart. I want to be able to say, "Lord, whatever you bless me with, I will in turn give it back to you." So often we pray asking God for this or that and then once we receive it, we praise Him for the blessing and then start praying for something else. I want to be able to turn those blessings back over to Him so that He can use them to bless others.